A Jog in the Park

Yesterday I went for a jog in the park. As a teenager, I used to go jog 'the back road' almost every day for years. Running had become somewhat a form of mediation for me, but the past year or so I have struggled to get back into the habit. Finally, this week I discovered a chunk of time every other morning that I could dedicate to a short morning jog, and I almost met my goal of 3 times a week.

Why I'm writing about jogging in the park is because as my mind was drifting back to my teenage years, and how good it felt to be running again, I noticed something. When I would reach the uphill part of my route, and I began to tire quickly, I noticed that I tend to look at the ground directly in front of me rather than a distant goal. I know that this seems contrary to the ‘keep your eye on the goal’ philosophy, but somehow, focusing on where I was right then made it easier to keep going.

As this thought finished, the words from a beloved hymn floated through my mind:

"Keep thou my feet; I do not ask to see

The distant scene - one step enough for me

...

I loved to choose and see my path; but now,

  Lead Thou me on!"

(Hymn # 97, Lead, Kindly Light)

  Sometimes, from where we are in life, we can't see the distance. We can't look ahead because it's unclear, and it's dark and we get scared. We get anxious just thinking about the future because we can’t see it- it’s out of our control and not going the way that we had planned! I still feel that way (a lot more than I should), but realizing that one step is indeed enough has helped me to free myself from unnecessary fears, concerns, and the need for control over my life. 

  My heart is on the goal - bringing myself and our family (whatever size it may be) back to the Lord's presence clean and pure - but my eyes, for now, are on the present. I don't need to know the details. I do not need to know why. What I do need to know and remember is that not only is it my goal and our goal to be worthy of eternal life, but it is the Lord's goal as well (see Moses 1:39) - and God does not fail! 

Golden Stitches (or Snitches...)

Life can be awful frustrating at times.

As a child, I thought that meant we had to do chores around the house. As a teenager I thought it meant that our family of six had to share a single vehicle - when four of us had jobs at different places in town. Now, as a married young adult, I am learning that life is a big scary mess; but it is held together by beautiful, soul-enriching moments; golden stitches if you will.

This blog is something I felt I needed to do. I need to tell our story; as much for my own sanity and understanding as anything. So much has happened in the past year of our lives, it's got to make a great story someday!

I really believe that the most beautiful stories are painted with a wide variety of colors - sometimes full of colorful patterns, and sometimes large patches of dark, accented by streaks of bright. So this is my attempt to capture my story - our story - in a way that all of the beautiful colors and textures can be seen as a whole piece of artwork - touched by the Master's hand.

"Life is but a Weaving" (The Tapestry Poem)

"My life is but a weaving
Between my God and me.
I cannot choose the colors
He weaveth steadily.

Oft'times He weaveth sorrow;
And I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper
And I the underside.

Not 'til the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly
Will God unroll the canvas
And reveal the reason why.

The dark threads are as needful
In the weaver's skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned.

He knows, He loves, He cares;
Nothing this truth can dim.
He gives the very best to those
Who leave the choice to Him."

-Corrie ten Boom